This week’s question comes from Carl of St. Croix Falls. He asks:
“I work in retail and have for most of my life. I have been at my particular company for about 12 years. I have had weekends off for most of that time since our manager hires an employee specifically for the weekend shifts. Recently the employee hired for weekends decided she wants weekends off, and complained about working weekends to the manager who said I will now have to work one weekend per month. Being a team player, I agreed, but the manager promised me that I would never have to work more than one weekend per month. A couple of months have passed. Despite her promise of one weekend per month, now the same manager has said I will have to work two weekends per month. My issue isn’t so much working weekends, but it’s the fact that trust was broken between me and the manager. How do I trust her going forward? I have been there 12 years and generally like my job. Do I work it out, or is it time to move on? I do have an offer for the same pay from “the competition.” I am so confused about what I should do.”

When you are faced with what seems like a difficult decision or big choice, confusion is not uncommon. It shows up when we think things like, “I don’t know what is right” or “I don’t know if I should trust her.” And anytime we think we don’t know, we make it harder for ourselves to tune into our own wisdom and knowledge.

Deciding to trust someone doesn’t follow strict universal guidelines. Whether or not you decide to trust your manager is dependent on what you think about her actions. Someone else may experience a similar circumstance and have a completely different response, and both can be right for each individual. 

You could choose to believe positive things about your manager and your job, but it’s also understandable that you may not want to and are questioning how to proceed. There is no one-size-fits-all solution. You decide what is best for you. 

To figure out your solution, get curious: Why would you choose to stay? Why would you choose to leave? Take note of your reasons for and against each option. 

For each of those reasons, consider what feeling would be driving you to choose that option. Most likely some of your reasons may be tied to fear, anger, or frustration; whereas, others might be from curiosity, excitement, or even love. What do you want to drive this choice?

While we often think there is one right answer out there, the reality is that either decision could be the “right” one. What will make it “right” for you is what you choose to think about having made that decision. You determine the reasons that you want to guide your decision to stay or leave.

No matter what, both the current job and the new job opportunity will include both positives and negatives. Challenges will exist in either situation. You get to decide if you want to stick with the mix of good and bad that you know or if you want to find out what the good and bad look like in the new retail job. The key to any decision? Be sure you like your reasons.

Do you have a question for a Master Certified Life Coach? Please send your questions to kari@heykarianne.com OR submit via the “Ask Kari” page at heykarianne.com.